I always believed budgeting was important. But when my husband, Ethan, started treating our finances like a courtroom trial—demanding I justify every dollar I spent, even on essentials like diapers and tampons—I knew this wasn’t about money.

So, I played along.

But what Ethan didn’t know was that I was about to teach him the most expensive lesson of his life.

Marriage, I thought, was supposed to be a partnership. And for a while, ours was.

Ethan and I had been together for six years, married for three. Before the twins, we were equals. I had a thriving career in marketing; he worked in finance. We split expenses down the middle, never arguing about money.

“Look at us adulting like pros,” Ethan would say during our monthly budget reviews. “Most couples fight about money, but we’ve got this down to a science.”

I’d clink my coffee mug against his. “That’s because neither of us is trying to be the boss of the other’s wallet. Novel concept, right?”

Then I got pregnant with twins.

And everything changed.

We agreed I’d take a year off work to care for our babies. It seemed reasonable at the time.

But then James and Lily arrived, and our once-organized life exploded into a whirlwind of sleepless nights, endless diaper changes, and a house that looked like a baby supply store had been ransacked by tiny, sticky burglars.

I barely had time to shower, let alone scrutinize receipts. But as the months passed, I noticed Ethan changing.

It started with small, offhand comments.

“Holy cow, we’re burning through formula like it’s free,” he remarked one night.

“Yeah,” I said dryly. “Turns out babies don’t photosynthesize. Who knew?”

Then came the sighs whenever I added diapers to the shopping list. The raised eyebrows at grocery bills.

And then, one Tuesday night, after the twins were finally asleep and I managed to cook a real meal, he said it.

“I think you need to be more mindful about spending since you’re not earning right now.”

I put my fork down slowly. “I’m sorry, what?”

“You’re not bringing in money, Lauren,” he said, as if explaining math to a toddler. “You should track what you spend and justify it. It’ll teach you to be more economical.”